Saturday, October 08, 2005

House Votes 212 to 210 to Massage Its Prostate 

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The Official Corporate House of Representatives' Secret Handshake (see above) is often performed while one or both participating members sing "You Make Me Feel So Young":

You make me feel so young
You make me feel like spring has sprung
Every time I see you grin
I’m such a happy individual

The moment that you speak
I want to go and play hide-and-seek
I want to go and bounce the moon
Just like a toy balloon

You and I, are just like a couple of tots
Running across the meadow
Picking up lots of forget-me-nots

You make me feel so young
You make me feel there are songs to be sung
Bells to be rung, and a wonderful fling to be flung

And even when I’m old and gray
I’m gonna feel the way I do today
’cause you make me feel so young

Writer(s): Myrow/Gordon


Image from here.

People who enjoy sausage and/or how bills are passed in Congress should put hot coals up the House of Representatives' collective ass and see if either comes out.

No, I'm not bitter, I'm zesty!


Update: Shame, shame, shame...Damn these assholes past the provinces of god.


Friday, October 07, 2005

Karl who? 

WASHINGTON - White House Deputy Chief of Staff Karl Rove told President Bush and others that he never engaged in an effort to disclose a CIA operative’s identity to discredit her husband’s criticism of the administration’s Iraq policy, according to people with knowledge of Rove’s account in the investigation.

They said Rove’s denial to Bush occurred during a brief conversation in fall 2003, shortly after media reports revealed that former Ambassador Joseph Wilson’s wife, Valerie Plame, worked as a covert CIA operative.
(via MSGOP)
Somebody's trying to distance themselves from Unka Karl, aren't they?

When stories like this start appearing it's only a matter of time before Karl is out the door.

Pass the popcorn.

Riggsveda off to Baton Rouge to help with disaster relief 

Here. She just barely had time to pack her bags, so...

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Zarqawi's Middle Management Problems 

Did you know that Zarqawi had 33 "top lieutenants?"

My goodness.

I think he needs to downsize, don't you?

Deep In the Heart of Harriet 

At last we have a chance to know the true heart of our...possible...next Supreme Court justice:

(via Harriet Miers Blog)

From the Blog-o-sphere:

It's hard to overstate how disappointing the nomination of Harriet Miers is.

I think some people have forgotten Ronald Reagan's 11th Amendment to the Constitution: "Thou Shalt Not Speak Ill of a Fellow Republican." These people are what I call ALBINOs: Americans who Like Bush In Name Only!!

Well personally I'm going to try to UPHOLD the Constitution--not "legislate from the blog"!!
posted by Harriet Miers @ 5:30 PM 8 comments
Go read. It's deep, deep I tell you.

A Traitor on Cheney's Staff 

The Justice Department is investigating whether a naturalized U.S. citizen from the Philippines stole classified documents while he worked in the office of Vice President Cheney and provided the information to opposition politicians in Manila, Bush administration officials said yesterday.
(via MSGOP/WaPo)
Can you imagine what we'd be hearing if this had happened in the Clinton White House?

That a spy had been working on Al Gore's staff?

We'd be hip-deep in the wingnuts' spittle-splattering righteous indignation by now.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

President Bush Pays Scottie a Surprise Visit 

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(AP) During a morning briefing with White House beat reporters, Scott McClellan was literally shoved aside by an invigorated and breathless President Bush who grabbed the microphone and said "Hello, Mikey" then looked up and glared at reporters, asking "Who are you?" Following behind him in a tattered skirt and holding a half-filled fluted champagne glass, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice stumbled, righted herself, then sat down on the floor and released a series of finely carbonated belches. Noticing the heel of her shoe was broken, Condi placed the stem in her mouth and tried to smoke it.

President Bush responded by breaking into an impromptu rendition of "Gumby" with his own lyrics: "She can walk into any ditch with her phony pal Peekachu, if you have a heart than Condi will rip it out of you!" Steadying himself at the podium, President Bush took off his pointy party hat, straightened his tie and appeared momentarily to be organizing his Press Secretary's notes. After a brief pause to sniff his fingers, the 43rd President of the United States began tossing each piece of note paper in the air while proclaiming "Bullshit, bullshit--oh, this one is charcoal-filtered bullshit" until he was escorted away by Secret Service, who, to their credit, did not release so much as one guffaw.

In a statement released shortly after these events, the White House has announced that yet another bartender has been given a "...really, really big medal," and has assured the nation that Condi "has a stinky man-hole."

Harriet Miers, who played Alice on the Brady Bunch, just shrugged the whole thing off and continued folding laundry.


Image from here.


Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Did Harry Reid throw Bush an anvil? 

There's been some heartburning about Harry Reid suggesting Harriet Mier's name to Bush (as if Bush would actually listen to anyone except one of his enablers).

But "When your enemy's drowing, throw him an anvil," and maybe that's exactly what Reid did. [Continued at The Mighty Corrente Building.]

Why can't America take the first step? 

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholoil—that our lives had become unmanageable.

That's sure true, isn't it? Continue the meeting at The Mighty Corrente Building.

The Kool Kidz Don't "Out" People -- or Do They? 

Not all outing campaigns gain traction. A cadre of activist bloggers and alternative-media journalists have been contending for more than a year that another Republican congressman is gay and yet has often voted against gay-rights legislation. Thus far, the mainstream media — both national outlets and those in the congressman’s home region — have declined to report on the campaign, although the effort is common knowledge among political reporters and on Capitol Hill.
(via MS(obviously in this case)GOP)
I'm still not quite sure how I feel about this sort of thing but what the hell is the point of raising David Dreier's case without mentioning his name?

It's not like you're being a paragon of virtue by not mentioning it. If anything you've now cause a bunch of folks reading this article to Google and find out about it. If you think it's wrong to "out" people, then you wouldn't do this because, for all intents and purposes, you've actually just outted Dreier to your readers because Google is pretty damned simple.

What is it about the Kool Kidz that causes them to glory in their ability to play the role of censor?

This is quite bizarre in this case because this story probably just outted Dreier for several thousand of MSGOP's readers.

Mr. Rabble asks a question: 

I elected 'em last year. So how come they're always saying they'll represent me next year?

Take the poll! Help Mr. and Mrs. Rabble and the kids, Scooter and Britney, name the family dog. No freeping (ha)!

UPDATE Link fixed. Sorry!

Fascism: visited and revisited 

"Land of the Corporative State": redux.

- a dispatch from Obscurity


Indictable Boy 

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Well, he went down to Houston in his Sunday best
Indictable boy, they all said
And he rubbed Corporate Money all over his chest
Indictable boy, they all said
Well, he’s just an indictable boy

He took in donations, put him in a quandry
Indictable boy, they all said
He stood there buck naked doing a lot of laundry
Indictable boy, they all said
Well, he’s just an indictable boy

He took Roy Blunt out for a little trip
Indictable boy, they all said
And he taught him how to crack a majority whip
Indictable boy, they all said
Well, he’s just an indictable boy

After ten long years they let him back in the House
Indictable boy, they all said
He lit a bug bomb and then ran like a mouse
Indictable boy, they all said
Well, he’s just an indictable boy




Monday, October 03, 2005

Miers is a "Third Rate" Legal Mind 

Just talked to a very pro-Bush legal type who says he is ashamed and embarrassed this morning. Says Miers was with an undistinguished law firm; never practiced constitutional law; never argued any big cases; never was on law review; has never written on any of the important legal issues. Says she's not even second rate, but is third rate. Dozens and dozens of women would have been better qualified. Says a crony at FEMA is one thing, but on the high court is something else entirely. Her long history of activity with ABA is not encouraging from a conservative perspective--few conservatives would spend their time that way. In short, he says the pick is “deplorable.” There may be an element of venting here, but thought I'd pass along for what it's worth. It's certainly indicative of the mood right now...
(via Kevin's Blog)
And that's a conservative talking. That's from a blog post from Rich Lowry over at the National Review Online.

I think Bush has managed to hack off everybody with this pick. That's quite an achievement, W old boy. Miers is a hack folks. She's just a partisan hack. It's actually a perfect appointment from this cronyfied administration. It's perfectly emblematic of the problem with this administration. It's never been about qualifications or competence, it's about loyalty.

BTW, isn't W about to run out of yes men and yes women to appoint to jobs? I keep thinking he's appointed every last close friend, family friend, political friend, or even distant loyal acquaintance of his to a job.

But then he appoints another one -- each one less impressive than the last.

Why Miers is Most Qualified For the Supremes 

It didn't take a very extensive Google to turn up just what makes Bush think Miss Harriet is just Supremely qualified for her proposed next job:

(via Philadelphia Daily News)
White House counsel Harriet Miers has never served as a judge before, and while this career "hard-nosed lawyer" (as she is invariably described) from Texas certainly deserves some kudos for a trailblazing career as a female lawyer, she's not a legal scholar, either.

But she does know better than just about anyone else where the bodies are buried (relax, it's a just a metaphor...we hope) in President Bush's National Guard scandal. In fact, Bush's Texas gubenatorial campaign in 1998 (when he was starting to eye the White House) actually paid Miers $19,000 to run an internal pre-emptive probe of the potential scandal. Not long after, a since-settled lawsuit alleged that the Texas Lottery Commission -- while chaired by Bush appointee Miers -- played a role in a multi-million dollar cover-up of the scandal.

Whatever Miers knows about the president's troubled past, she may soon be keeping that information underneath the black robe of an Associate Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court. Miers, who not long ago succeeded Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez as White House counsel, is now Bush's pick to replace retiring Justice Sandra Day O'Connor:

Miers is a skilled lawyer -- mainly on behalf of big business, including Microsoft and Disney -- and the first woman elected Texas State Bar President. But her main qualifications for the highest court in the land appear to be the same as most of Bush's recent appointments: He is unfailingly loyal to George W. Bush.
This is clearly a snow job. Miers will never sit on the Supreme Court, but while we're going through the high theatrics necessary to block her, attention will be turned away from Frist, DeLay, the wreckage of the Federal bureaucracy and the rampant theft and cronyism that is at the heart of the Scandal-Plagued Bush Administration.

It's multitasking time, folks.

Sunday, October 02, 2005


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The Bad Magician forgets where he puts things. He even forgets the things themselves. A memory comes in anyway.

A package of waves arrive from an old beach: The Bad Magician remembered the way the drowned man was carried ashore, gray and blue was his skin, his body bent, hard like stone, a woman screaming in the sand. A crowd gathered and the man perfected dying: a back broken, a lung submerged in salt water, the horrible shock when clear sky and warm air painted borders describing the defeat of our blood, our ways. The Bad Magician remembers: He turns the memory into the President's flesh, which jerks against his will. The surf floods in, and we ride the curl.

In the East: Coffee is served on the President's face in the Amputee Wing of the White House. Iraqi children, stubbornly dead and hollow, bring him toast and beer, dragging their feet in wagons behind them. The President presses a button on his neck and fills his throat with sand. 'I must get out of me,' thinks the President. He looks at the ceiling: the Pacific Ocean surges in convex waves, cascading upwards, then down. The President turns to me. I cannot help him now.

"I am the President!" says the President. His eyes twitch, watering, weeping portals on the sea. A wave knocks him down. Laura smiles from the beach. Where is the father? The father is gone.

America carries the broken President onto the shore and lowers him onto his towel, a confederate rag of Old Alliances. Lifeguard Karl dissipates into thin air, a Tempest vapor. Norquist looks up from his bathtub and cries. Cheney falls out of the medicine chest: he cashes checks and eats a doctor. "I am the President," repeats the President. A crowd surrounds him, winks at him, "You're doing a heck of a job there, Bushie."

What happened to the man on the beach? Sometimes, we curl up like dead things, and rocks become our home.

The Bad Magician calls the Coroner and sends him to America. "Check out the Lincoln Memorial," says The Bad Magician.

The rest is silence.


Crossposted at Mortaljive.


Outing Valerie Plame is the tape on the Watergate doors 

It's a story, but only a small episode in the real story.

Miller_Keller_SulzbergerLet's start connecting dots by looking at this photo from AP. Shot from below, the photo has a wierdly triumphalist, Leni Riefenstahl feel to it. However, the photo conveys its message clearly enough: Judy "Kneepads" Miller has management on her side. On both sides, in fact.

But why? [Continued at The Mighty Corrente Building.]

Tom DeLay Makes "America's Most Wanted" 

So it starts out like a typical episode of "America's Most Wanted" (or what I gather is a typical opening since I really don't watch the show that much. I want to know about crime, I read blogs. But anyway...)
One of south Florida's biggest mysteries is the bizarre case involving multi-millionaire 51-year-old Konstantinos "Gus" Boulis.
Yeah, okay, big whoop. Rich Florida dude, owner of sandwich shops and a cruise line, gets whacked. Lamentable, of course, but why note it here? Because just look whose name shows up next:
Now, high-profile Washington DC lobbyist, Jack Abramoff and Adam Kidan have been charged with conspiracy and wire fraud for allegedly scheming to defraud two lenders in the purchase of SunCruz Casinos.
Oh me oh my! Indeed we know the name Abramoff, do we not? So the question is, will AMW do any dot-connecting to other criminal conspirators who have been in the news lately? Why, wonder of wonders, indeed they do!
Abramoff - a central figure in investigations involving House Majority Leader Tom DeLay - has pled not guilty against those charges in a Florida court.
Emphasis added, just because it looks so good.

As noted, I don't watch "America's Most Wanted" all that much. Then again, I sort of suspect most of their usual audience doesn't read blogs that often either. This story has just penetrated a whole 'nother market. Heh heh heh.

Department of Stop it! You're killing me! "Let Bush be Bush!" 

It's a quiet, calm morning in Philly--I haven't read the latest crotte from David "I'm Writing As Bad As I Can" Brooks, and in any case I'm insufficiently caffeinated.

So I'm not—snicker—laughing hysterically at the latest attempt by the White House to buff their turd:

"Doing his job has always been his strongest suit," said one adviser close to the White House. "Let Bush be Bush. Let him lead. It's what Bush does in times like these."

Heh heh heh. Let me put my coffee down for a moment; it's not corporate swill from Starbucks, and I don't want to waste it. Snort.


Make no mistake:

That idle, arrogant, evasive, irresponsible, uncaring shit magnet and Clint Black wannabe was "the Real Bush."

How do we know? Because when Katrina hit, all Bush's enablers and handlers weren't around to protect him from himself. Rove (we're told) was having a kidney stone removed. Cheney (we're told) was on vacation. And the rest of Bush's staff is so terrified of The Man that they were reduced to making a DVD of the corpses in the streets of New Orleans to get His attention.

We've already let "Bush be Bush."

And it's not a pretty sight.

NOTE Riggs shows how to get your Frank Rich and Paul Krugman at the Renovated Corrente Building.

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