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))))) !!!BREAKING - FLASH!!! (((((

BARACK OBAMA TO PRESENT HILLARY CLINTON WITH $30,000 RHINESTONE JUMPSUIT!

Spokespersons for Barack Obama have yet to deny rumors - circulating since Tuesday afternoon - that the president-elect will present Senator Hillary Clinton with a $30,000 tangerine topaz and crystal rhinestone jumpsuit created for her by Italian designer Swarovski Rivolli.

Sources close to this investigation have also hinted that first lady-elect Michelle O'Bama is furious with her husband's decision to appease the former first lady and Senator from New York (who has accepted a cabinet appointment as Secretary of State in the forthcoming Obama administration) with such an audacious "inauguration" gift.

Unnamed sources have also indicated that Mrs Obama has threatened to release an audio tape of her husband clearly referring to former president Bill Clinton as a "fat meddling whitey-assed motherfucker" should Mr Obama insist on pursuing his allegeded current policy of further rewarding Mrs Clinton.

Spokespersons for both the Obama's and the Clinton's were not available to answer additional questions at the time of this posting. Italian designer Swarovski Rivolli is reportedly vacationing in Costa Rica with Portuguese supermodel Preciosa Platanares and could not be reached for comment.

[...DEVELOPING...]


In other developments:
Reliable sources in the vicinity of the RNC have confirmed that clothing, jewelry, and various whimsical accessories purchased by the McCain campaign on behalf of Sarah Palin and family during the general election (and valued at approximately $150,000) have been fully accounted for and since donated to several small Inupiat communities located near the city of Barrow on Alaska's North Slope.





Spokespersons for the RNC and the former McCain campaign have yet to respond or provide additional comment for this story. Sarah Palin and Fred Thompson will be in Orlando, Florida over the weekend appearing together in a dinner theater adaptation of Frederick Kohner's 1957 novel Gidget; The Little Girl With Big Ideas.

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