Monday, April 18, 2005
Alpo Accounts: Inerrant Boy shares His wealth-building secrets!
Inerrant Boy has become a Dismal Scientist:
But those are mere blips! Now, the money quote:
Yeah, it's called Social Security! It's worked for seventy years, and there's no reason to change it!
Right. "Um, Mr. Broker, lemme see that brochure. Do you have a plan that doesn't have any risk in, oh, 2020? You do? Great! Here's my money! Hey, what's so funny? Nothing?"
No, but seriously, folks—Doesn't Bush remind you of one of those guys you read about in The Metro? The kind who claims you can make money at home in your pajamas if you just follow his few easy steps? And take his course or buy his software? "I'm President Bush! And I'm known for my bold and daring challenges!"
Doesn't it seem like Bush is trying to have it both ways? Either your investment has a higher rate of return because there's more risk, or it doesn't.
If Bush has invented a way to get the high rate of return without risk—in other words, free money!—He would be a wizard of finance and a billionaire.
Which, needless to say, He isn't.
After returning to the White House, Bush told CNBC that private retirement accounts are a good idea even though the stock market is slipping as investors worry about rising gas prices and the strength of the U.S. economy.
(via AP)
But those are mere blips! Now, the money quote:
"[BUSH] Most people will tell you that if you hold money over a long term, the rate of return on a conservative mix of bonds and stocks clearly is greater than that which the government earns on your behalf," he said. "There are ways to design plans that take the risk out of a plan.
Yeah, it's called Social Security! It's worked for seventy years, and there's no reason to change it!
In other words, you switch your mix of bonds and stocks to an instrument that will take care of any market swings toward the end of your retirement."
Right. "Um, Mr. Broker, lemme see that brochure. Do you have a plan that doesn't have any risk in, oh, 2020? You do? Great! Here's my money! Hey, what's so funny? Nothing?"
No, but seriously, folks—Doesn't Bush remind you of one of those guys you read about in The Metro? The kind who claims you can make money at home in your pajamas if you just follow his few easy steps? And take his course or buy his software? "I'm President Bush! And I'm known for my bold and daring challenges!"
Doesn't it seem like Bush is trying to have it both ways? Either your investment has a higher rate of return because there's more risk, or it doesn't.
If Bush has invented a way to get the high rate of return without risk—in other words, free money!—He would be a wizard of finance and a billionaire.
Which, needless to say, He isn't.
