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Sunday, March 06, 2005

Bush the Bad Dad balances the checkbook 

You know, back when I was growing up, way back in the '50s, the Man Of The House was supposed to be able to manage the family budget. In fact, my Dad would sit at the kitchen table and balance the checkbook.

You can tell Bush has never had to do that, never even thought of doing it. Like Dean says" the Republicans can't handle money."

Take the 2005 budget (please!):

President Bush's budget would keep federal deficits over $200 billion annually over the next decade, Congress' top budget analyst said Friday in a report raising doubts about White House efforts to contain the shortfalls.

The analysis by the nonpartisan Congressional Budget Office said Bush's plans for spending and taxes would yield deficits through the decade ending in 2015 totaling $2.58 trillion. That is $1.6 trillion worse than they would be if none of the president's fiscal plans become law, the budget office said, the chief factor being [H]is plan to make already enacted tax cuts permanent.
(via AP)

And look what Bush left out!

The congressional analyst noted that Bush's budget [1] omitted the costs of overhauling Social Security, which some analysts expect to exceed $1 trillion for the first decade.

Bush's budget [2] also omits any new funds for U.S. military and reconstruction operations in Iraq and Afghanistan for 2006. The congressional analyst said keeping next year's military operations at this year's levels would probably add about $40 billion to the 2006 shortfall, pushing it to perhaps $375 billion.

Obviously, the press is being really, really kind to Inerrant Boy here, what a surprise! "Raising doubts?" The Republicans are barely going through the motions of enacting a budget, let alone balancing one. What kind of a budget is it that leaves all the biggest items out? And all the press can do is write He said, She said stories.

Let's imagine Bush The Bad Dad sitting roung the kitchen table, doing the checkbook, and try to follow his reasoning:

1. OK, the paycheck got slashed cause I banged in late one too many times. Sweet Jesus, nothing adds up now! [making the tax cuts for the rich permanent]

2. But I've just gotta have a good chunk of change for Casino Night down at the church [privatizing social security]. And then there's my running tab for liquor down at Don's Package [Iraq, Afghanistan]...

3. Well, shit, let's just leave that stuff out. Good thing I keep these books in pencil, or Leadfoot would really go nukular. (Starts erasing)

4. OK, on the income side, let's just leave the paycheck like it was. I'll suck up to those tight asses in the front office, and next month I'll be right back in clover. Ya know, I don't even need to suck up to ol' Alan, I've got those photographs from the Christmas Party [the usual Rovian black ops] (scribbles some more) Heck, let's say I got a raise! (Writes in new salary) [Rosy revenue projections]

5. Then I'll put off the mortage for a month. Just a month. Well, maybe two [Postpone any and all problems]

6. Damn, that's closer, but it's still not looking good. How much was that bill for little Jenna's rehab? Cain't lay my hand on it, dammmit ...

7. Now, where's that stack from the credit card companies (gets out pencil again and starts erasing)

Bush the Bad Dad!

Maybe somebody can tell me how this crap about the Republicans being the daddy party got started again?

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