Friday, November 19, 2004
iWaq: A roundup of all the good news, and there sure is a lot of it!
At last, we're taking out the mosques!
Hospitals too! All I want to know is, What took us so long?
And we found an Al Qaeda headquarters? How do we know? They put a big sign on it!
Not for the cameras, right? Of course not!
And best of all, we're forcing the insurgents to make new friends, and the more new friends they make, they more likely they are to make mistakes!
More insurgents? That's just more proof that we're winning!
Kill 'em all! That's what great powers do! Let's create our own reality! Freedom's on the march, even if it's untidy! If you're not with us, you're against us! And you know who's against us? Satan! Are you for Satan! You are? Pussy! Und zo weiter ...
UPDATE And there's more good news! The money spigot has finally been turned on!
See? We've spent $400 million in six weeks, and we haven't even started rebuilding Fallujah and Mosul! Tell that to your panty-waisted Chablis-swilling so-called liberal friends. Pussies.
UPDATE Plus, we're giving them jobs!
$3,000?! To your typical rag-head, that's a fortune!
UPDATE Rereading this post, I see that I have become a little, um, unhinged. Look, I'm only saying what everybody's thinking, OK? Pussies.
Iraqi and U.S. troops raided a major Sunni mosque in the capital after Friday prayers, killing or seizing several people, according to local witnesses. Two people were killed and 14 wounded, hospital sources said after national guards backed by U.S. troops tried to storm the Hanifa mosque. Witnesses said worshippers threw shoes at the troops -- a grave insult in Islam -- and soldiers opened fire.
(via Reuters)
Hospitals too! All I want to know is, What took us so long?
The raid on the Zaharawi hospital in Mosul -- Iraq's third-largest city -- was conducted by Iraqi commandos with the Ministry of the Interior's Special Police Force, backed by U.S. troops.
(via WaPo)
And we found an Al Qaeda headquarters? How do we know? They put a big sign on it!
The U.S. troops came across a large house with a sign in Arabic that said "Al-Qaeda Organization," according to footage from a CNN crew embedded with the U.S. Army.
(via Ibid.)
Not for the cameras, right? Of course not!
And best of all, we're forcing the insurgents to make new friends, and the more new friends they make, they more likely they are to make mistakes!
Sattler, the Marine commander, said the Fallujah offensive had "broken the back of the insurgency" in Iraq, disrupting rebel operations across the country.
"Each and every time we can force these individuals to go to new locations, expand their circle of friends -- if you want to call it that -- to include some that they don't know and they don't trust, they'll bring in rookies, more-junior people that will, in fact, make mistakes," he said. "This is going to make it very hard for them to operate."
(WaPo)
More insurgents? That's just more proof that we're winning!
Kill 'em all! That's what great powers do! Let's create our own reality! Freedom's on the march, even if it's untidy! If you're not with us, you're against us! And you know who's against us? Satan! Are you for Satan! You are? Pussy! Und zo weiter ...
UPDATE And there's more good news! The money spigot has finally been turned on!
Of the $18.4 billion in Iraq reconstruction funds allocated by Congress last year, only $1.7 billion has been spent, Hess said, an increase of about $400 million from six weeks ago. He said 873 construction projects have been started, up from 703 six weeks ago. The goal is to have 1,000 started by year's end.
(AP)
See? We've spent $400 million in six weeks, and we haven't even started rebuilding Fallujah and Mosul! Tell that to your panty-waisted Chablis-swilling so-called liberal friends. Pussies.
UPDATE Plus, we're giving them jobs!
insurgent leaders in the area offer cash bounties for killing certain kinds of people: $1,000 for a Shiite, $2,000 for a member of the Iraqi National Guard and $3,000 for an American.
(USA Today)
$3,000?! To your typical rag-head, that's a fortune!
UPDATE Rereading this post, I see that I have become a little, um, unhinged. Look, I'm only saying what everybody's thinking, OK? Pussies.