Sunday, August 15, 2004
Twenty Questions for Inerrant Boy
We've been working on a list of questions we'd like to ask Bush; here they are.
The Kerry campaign has a site called "Ask the President" (thanks to alert reader raison de fem). It couldn't hurt to post some of the questions below there. (Sure, the form is an email-address-capturing device, but who cares? There's a lot at stake.) The Kerry campaign—or the surrogate team it has yet to form—sorely needs some spunk and snark. Let's give 'em some, courtesy of Corrente and the blogosphere....
NOTE: In this simulated transcript, I have replaced the press's usual kneepad-appropriate salutation to Bush—"My Lord"—with the "Sir" that most Americans still expect.
Readers, have at it... Maybe we can break 50!
1. Sir, how long have you been taking medication?
2. Sir, a follow up: Are you taking medication now?
3. Sir, it has been suggested (Dr. Justin Frank, "Bush on the Couch", 2004) that certain medical treatments you have received as president are consistent with alcohol-induced liver disease. Will you release your medical records so that Americans can make an informed decision about your physical fitness for another term? (alert reader Bob H)
4. Sir, why will you not authorize the release of the microfilm of your entire personnel file from the Texas Air National Guard, to prove that you did your sworn duty as an officer?
5. Sir, have you ever performed community service in Houston? (alert reader Personal)
6. Sir, you've taken a very strong moral stand against abortion. Did you ever pay for one? (alert reader Elton)
7. Sir, how many convicted felons are working for the White House? Is Elliott Abrams the only one, or are there more?
8. Sir, speaking of felonies: Looting relics from a crash scene is a felony for which American citizens have been tried and convicted (back). Your Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld, removed relics from the Pentagon 9/11 site. Do you believe that he is guilty of a felony and, if so, would you support his indictment?
9. Sir, reporters are risking jail time because they won't give Federal prosecutors the name(s) of administration official(s) who told them, in confidence, that Valerie Plame was a CIA operative, a potential felony. Why won't you resolve this matter by voiding the pledge of confidence, so that the reporters can speak the truth freely, and allow the Federal prosecutors to bring this matter to a close?
10. Sir, why have you not issued an executive order to repay the families who had to buy body armor for their soldier children in Iraq?
11. Sir, if you opposed the use of torture, then why have you not commended Sergent Darby, who blew the whistle on torture at Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq?
12. Sir, in the course of the last terror alert, administration officials revealed the name of Muhammad Naeem Noor Khan, an intelligence asset within Al Qaeda. First, do you believe that blowing Khan's cover helped or hindered the war on terror? Second, have you reprimanded the official who revealed Khan's name?
13. Sir, would you support a ban for all electronic voting machines that do not leave an audit trail? If not, why not?
14. Sir, do you believe that people who attend your campaign rallies wearing John Kerry T-shirts should be arrested? (Inspired by Jim in Chicago)
15. Sir, a follow up: Do you believe that all American citizens should be able to attend your campaign rallies, or only those who, in advance, sign a pledge to support you in the coming election? (Inspired by Jim in Chicago)
16. Sir, under what circumstances would you support postponement of the coming Presidential election?
17. Sir, will you apologize to the American people for being the first President to end a term with a net loss of jobs since Herbert Hoover?
18. Sir, do you support or oppose the use of fake IDs by American citizens?
19. Sir, do you believe it is God's will that you are president? (alert reader Anonymous)
20. Sir, do you believe in the Rapture? If so, are you working to bring it about?
21. Sir, how old is the earth? In particular, is it more than 6000 years old? (inspired by alert reader Iowa Democrat)
[Possible follow-up:] 21.1. Sir, if you say that good Americans can differ on the age of the earth, does that mean that you do not believe that the Bible is the inerrant word of God?
OK, so it's 21 questions, not 20. The same Republican who does the budget and the jobs creation figures must have been counting...
NOTE: This post was originally titled "QTWWAB (Questions the Whores Won't Ask Bush)," but Corrente alert readers are doing such a spectacular job posing questions that I thought I'd retitle it, do some reordering, and push it onto the top of the stack.
The Kerry campaign has a site called "Ask the President" (thanks to alert reader raison de fem). It couldn't hurt to post some of the questions below there. (Sure, the form is an email-address-capturing device, but who cares? There's a lot at stake.) The Kerry campaign—or the surrogate team it has yet to form—sorely needs some spunk and snark. Let's give 'em some, courtesy of Corrente and the blogosphere....
NOTE: In this simulated transcript, I have replaced the press's usual kneepad-appropriate salutation to Bush—"My Lord"—with the "Sir" that most Americans still expect.
Readers, have at it... Maybe we can break 50!
1. Sir, how long have you been taking medication?
2. Sir, a follow up: Are you taking medication now?
3. Sir, it has been suggested (Dr. Justin Frank, "Bush on the Couch", 2004) that certain medical treatments you have received as president are consistent with alcohol-induced liver disease. Will you release your medical records so that Americans can make an informed decision about your physical fitness for another term? (alert reader Bob H)
4. Sir, why will you not authorize the release of the microfilm of your entire personnel file from the Texas Air National Guard, to prove that you did your sworn duty as an officer?
5. Sir, have you ever performed community service in Houston? (alert reader Personal)
6. Sir, you've taken a very strong moral stand against abortion. Did you ever pay for one? (alert reader Elton)
7. Sir, how many convicted felons are working for the White House? Is Elliott Abrams the only one, or are there more?
8. Sir, speaking of felonies: Looting relics from a crash scene is a felony for which American citizens have been tried and convicted (back). Your Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld, removed relics from the Pentagon 9/11 site. Do you believe that he is guilty of a felony and, if so, would you support his indictment?
9. Sir, reporters are risking jail time because they won't give Federal prosecutors the name(s) of administration official(s) who told them, in confidence, that Valerie Plame was a CIA operative, a potential felony. Why won't you resolve this matter by voiding the pledge of confidence, so that the reporters can speak the truth freely, and allow the Federal prosecutors to bring this matter to a close?
10. Sir, why have you not issued an executive order to repay the families who had to buy body armor for their soldier children in Iraq?
11. Sir, if you opposed the use of torture, then why have you not commended Sergent Darby, who blew the whistle on torture at Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq?
12. Sir, in the course of the last terror alert, administration officials revealed the name of Muhammad Naeem Noor Khan, an intelligence asset within Al Qaeda. First, do you believe that blowing Khan's cover helped or hindered the war on terror? Second, have you reprimanded the official who revealed Khan's name?
13. Sir, would you support a ban for all electronic voting machines that do not leave an audit trail? If not, why not?
14. Sir, do you believe that people who attend your campaign rallies wearing John Kerry T-shirts should be arrested? (Inspired by Jim in Chicago)
15. Sir, a follow up: Do you believe that all American citizens should be able to attend your campaign rallies, or only those who, in advance, sign a pledge to support you in the coming election? (Inspired by Jim in Chicago)
16. Sir, under what circumstances would you support postponement of the coming Presidential election?
17. Sir, will you apologize to the American people for being the first President to end a term with a net loss of jobs since Herbert Hoover?
18. Sir, do you support or oppose the use of fake IDs by American citizens?
19. Sir, do you believe it is God's will that you are president? (alert reader Anonymous)
20. Sir, do you believe in the Rapture? If so, are you working to bring it about?
21. Sir, how old is the earth? In particular, is it more than 6000 years old? (inspired by alert reader Iowa Democrat)
[Possible follow-up:] 21.1. Sir, if you say that good Americans can differ on the age of the earth, does that mean that you do not believe that the Bible is the inerrant word of God?
OK, so it's 21 questions, not 20. The same Republican who does the budget and the jobs creation figures must have been counting...
NOTE: This post was originally titled "QTWWAB (Questions the Whores Won't Ask Bush)," but Corrente alert readers are doing such a spectacular job posing questions that I thought I'd retitle it, do some reordering, and push it onto the top of the stack.