Monday, August 02, 2004
Terror at The Historic Corrente Building
About noon, I'd finished polishing the chandaliers at The Historic Corrente Building here in beautiful Center City, Philadelphia, so I sat down to read the Inky, and Lo! The putative head of the Department of Electoral Security, Tom Ridge, revealed that he had "specific, credible" evidence that The Corrente Building was under imminent threat of a terrorist attack!
Jeepers!
So when I went across the street to the dollar store to buy lunch, I was especially careful to look around me for terrorists. But I didn't see a whole lot of 'em. The building itself was blocked off with Jersey barriers, and street next to us was blocked off with one of our many Corrente-logoed minivans, and there were two brand spankin' new Philadelphia Police Department Homeland Security paddy wagons parked up front.
And three "live shot" TV trucks.
Nothing was happening, so the cops and the TV people were lounging around, and every so often one of the TV lighting guys would fire up one of his lights. People were walking up and down the street, doing their noon-time shopping. The cart guys were selling their hot dogs, and the guys with the sunglasses and watches and CDs were doing good business. Sure, some of the cops had submachine guns, but Philly has that European flair.
So I brought my lunch back inside and started buffing the Program Director's Nimitz-scale mahagony desk.
With two questions in my mind:
1. Why would the DHS tip off the terrorists that The Corrente Building was a target? Isn't that called "revealing intelligence sources and methods" or something?
2. Can the Republicans really believe that Pennsylvania is a swing state? Just asking.
Jeepers!
So when I went across the street to the dollar store to buy lunch, I was especially careful to look around me for terrorists. But I didn't see a whole lot of 'em. The building itself was blocked off with Jersey barriers, and street next to us was blocked off with one of our many Corrente-logoed minivans, and there were two brand spankin' new Philadelphia Police Department Homeland Security paddy wagons parked up front.
And three "live shot" TV trucks.
Nothing was happening, so the cops and the TV people were lounging around, and every so often one of the TV lighting guys would fire up one of his lights. People were walking up and down the street, doing their noon-time shopping. The cart guys were selling their hot dogs, and the guys with the sunglasses and watches and CDs were doing good business. Sure, some of the cops had submachine guns, but Philly has that European flair.
So I brought my lunch back inside and started buffing the Program Director's Nimitz-scale mahagony desk.
With two questions in my mind:
1. Why would the DHS tip off the terrorists that The Corrente Building was a target? Isn't that called "revealing intelligence sources and methods" or something?
2. Can the Republicans really believe that Pennsylvania is a swing state? Just asking.
