Friday, May 07, 2004
Who Needs Bob Woodward?
In The Sopranos this week, we find Little Carmine Lupertazzi dealing with the fallout from his ill-thought out decision to whack Joe Peeps over a dispute about protection money. Nicknamed "Brainless the Second" by Tony, Little Carmine has seized the reins of power after his father's death; his idea of being a Leader is handing out washing machines to his friends while boasting of his tacky "trompay la oil" paintings. In this scene, he tries to dismiss the growing worries of his older, loyal lieutenant, Angelo, and is supported by his second in command, the conniving toady Rusty Millio:
Little Carmine: The point I'm trying to illustrate is that of course no one wants conflict, but historically, historical changes have come out of war.
Rusty: As far as I'm concerned, it's a new day. All treaties and old ways of doing things are null and void.
Little Carmine : Exactly.
Angelo: And the Joe Peeps thing? Where does that leave us?
Rusty: When you've had a quadruple bypass like I did, it gives you a lot of time to think. The only thing Johnny understands is force.
Angelo: But the fact is, though, we pissed on a bees' nest.
Fourth Thug: So what's the other option--roll over?
Angelo: [pause] We could have had a sit down. Captains maybe...
Little Carmine: This isn't the UN, Angelo. I won't let what happened to my father, happen to me.
Rusty [unctuously]: God forgive me, but you may be a stronger man than your dad was.
[Carmine places his arm on Rusty's shoulder, affectionately.]
Little Carmine: The fundamental question is, will I be as effective as a boss as my Dad was? And I will be, even more so, but until I am, it is going to be hard to verify that I think I will be more effective.
Is it just me, or do you not have to be Jean Baudrillard to deconstruct this scene? Map Little Carmine, Rusty, and Angelo to Smirk, Dick and Colin, and you have a near-perfect fit, right down to Cheney's cardiac history, Shirk's Oedipal obsessions, and his sophomoric, macho gibberish.
Consider, too, that this episode was probably in the can at least six months ago. Who needs Bob Woodward?
I think "Little Carmine" is going to be my new nickname for Smirk.
Little Carmine: The point I'm trying to illustrate is that of course no one wants conflict, but historically, historical changes have come out of war.
Rusty: As far as I'm concerned, it's a new day. All treaties and old ways of doing things are null and void.
Little Carmine : Exactly.
Angelo: And the Joe Peeps thing? Where does that leave us?
Rusty: When you've had a quadruple bypass like I did, it gives you a lot of time to think. The only thing Johnny understands is force.
Angelo: But the fact is, though, we pissed on a bees' nest.
Fourth Thug: So what's the other option--roll over?
Angelo: [pause] We could have had a sit down. Captains maybe...
Little Carmine: This isn't the UN, Angelo. I won't let what happened to my father, happen to me.
Rusty [unctuously]: God forgive me, but you may be a stronger man than your dad was.
[Carmine places his arm on Rusty's shoulder, affectionately.]
Little Carmine: The fundamental question is, will I be as effective as a boss as my Dad was? And I will be, even more so, but until I am, it is going to be hard to verify that I think I will be more effective.
Is it just me, or do you not have to be Jean Baudrillard to deconstruct this scene? Map Little Carmine, Rusty, and Angelo to Smirk, Dick and Colin, and you have a near-perfect fit, right down to Cheney's cardiac history, Shirk's Oedipal obsessions, and his sophomoric, macho gibberish.
Consider, too, that this episode was probably in the can at least six months ago. Who needs Bob Woodward?
I think "Little Carmine" is going to be my new nickname for Smirk.