Monday, February 09, 2004
Signs of the times
Advocate interviews Roger Findiesen, American Airlines pilot and messenger of God.
I dunno - guys flying airplanes, on missions from God - haven't we already had about enough of that kind of thing?
And as I recall, haven't we been through all this holy-rollin' and bible shoutin' and prostelytizing evangelical buttonholin' great awakening crap before. I seem to remember reading about something similar reaching a kind of white noise boiling point between 1900 and the late 1930's? It seems to me that all we got for our efforts from that round of divine hooting was World War 1, the Great Depression, Nazi's and World War 2.
Do any of God's noisier passengers out there ever consider the possibility that they just may be giving the Great Pilot a holy goddamed headache, again and again and again, and that may account for some of the more seemingly unfortuante Almighty turbulence of late? Eh? You ever try to steer a family wagon across the cosmos with a back seat full of Jesus screechin' yahoos all demanding to know, are we there yet?!, are we there yet?!, what's our destination arrival time! Ay yi yi. It's enough to drive yer average Absolute Being over the apocalyptic brink. It wouldn't surprise me if this time around God were to announce the weather conditions in Denver, aim the whole fly-by-night circus at the side of a mountain, and push the eject button. So long ya stupid bastards!, witness this! - Haha!
Ya know? Wouldn't surprise me one bit.
In related Business News: American Airlines announces new slogan.
Exclusive: Interview with American Airlines pilot... Tuesday, Feb 10,2004 - The Advocate
"I just got back from a mission in Costa Rica," said Findiesen, a tall white man with neatly trimmed thick white hair and a mustache, both lightly peppered with black. "I felt that God was telling me to say something." He went on to explain that he felt God wanted him to witness to the passengers on his first flight upon returning to work for American Airlines after his mission. Despite this feeling, he said, he had decided not to say anything--but then he got another sign from God.
I dunno - guys flying airplanes, on missions from God - haven't we already had about enough of that kind of thing?
And as I recall, haven't we been through all this holy-rollin' and bible shoutin' and prostelytizing evangelical buttonholin' great awakening crap before. I seem to remember reading about something similar reaching a kind of white noise boiling point between 1900 and the late 1930's? It seems to me that all we got for our efforts from that round of divine hooting was World War 1, the Great Depression, Nazi's and World War 2.
Do any of God's noisier passengers out there ever consider the possibility that they just may be giving the Great Pilot a holy goddamed headache, again and again and again, and that may account for some of the more seemingly unfortuante Almighty turbulence of late? Eh? You ever try to steer a family wagon across the cosmos with a back seat full of Jesus screechin' yahoos all demanding to know, are we there yet?!, are we there yet?!, what's our destination arrival time! Ay yi yi. It's enough to drive yer average Absolute Being over the apocalyptic brink. It wouldn't surprise me if this time around God were to announce the weather conditions in Denver, aim the whole fly-by-night circus at the side of a mountain, and push the eject button. So long ya stupid bastards!, witness this! - Haha!
Ya know? Wouldn't surprise me one bit.
In related Business News: American Airlines announces new slogan.
Fly With Us Or Burn In Hell Monday, February 9, 2004 | TheDailyFarce.com
American Airlines today announced their new slogan, "Come, Fly With Us Or Burn In Hell". This new theme is a turning point in the history of American Airlines and domestic airlines in general.
"The airline industry has been toying with the idea of merging religion with air flight for quite a while now." Stated a senior Airline analyst who wished to remain anonymous, "But American Airlines is the first one to actually do it. This is a first in history and we just have to wait and see how passengers will react."
