Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Why George Bush Goes To Bed Early 

Well, besides needing his beauty sleep we mean. Which hasn't been having quite the revivifying effect lately that it used to; he might want to consider adding Oil of Uday, er, we mean Olay, to his skin-care routine. But the REAL reason...(drumroll)...It's so he doesn't have to watch Letterman.

(via Froomkin)

"Top Ten George W. Bush Complaints About 'Fahrenheit 9/11'

"10. That actor who played the president was totally unconvincing.

"9. It oversimplified the way I stole the election.

"8. Too many of them fancy college-boy words

"7. If Michael Moore had waited a few months, he could have included the part where I get him deported.

"6. Didn't have one of them hilarious monkeys who smoke cigarettes and gives people the finger.

"5. Of all Michael Moore's accusations, only 97% are true.

"4. Not sure -- I passed out after a piece of popcorn lodged in my windpipe.

"3. Where the hell was Spiderman?

"2. Couldn't hear most of the movie over Cheney's foul mouth.

"1. I thought this was supposed to be about dodgeball!"

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~ Since 2003 ~

The Washington Chestnut
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