Thursday, April 29, 2004

Cue The Boos 

Al Gore, apparently under the impression that he exists, has pledged to various entities of the Democratic Party, six million plus dollars that are to be drawn from his 2000 campaign accounts.

The former vice president pledged to donate $4 million to the Democratic National Committee. The party's Senate and House committees each will get $1 million, and the party from Gore's home state of Tennessee would receive $250,000.

The Democratic Party in Florida, site of the divisive 2000 election recount, will get $240,000 from a separate Gore campaign account. Republican campaign committees still hold a fund-raising advantage over Democrats.

"The outcome of this election is extremely important for the future of our country and for all that America stands for," Gore said. "I want to help John Kerry become president and I want to help Democrats retake control of the U.S. Senate and House of Representatives."

Ron Fournier is reporting for the WaPo, and you might just get the impression that he has some awareness that the poor hapless Gores aren't on Sally Quinns dinner party invitation list.

He shocked the political community late last year by endorsing then front-runner Dean, whose campaign collapsed several weeks later in Iowa.

That deserves the award for being the most (fill in the blank) statement of the week, but what kind? Readers?

This one I think I can peg:

Gore narrowly lost Florida and the presidential race after the Supreme Court stopped the disputed recount.

Misstatement masquerading as an understatement? I guess it depends on what your definition of "lost," or perhaps "won" is.

Despite his endorsement of Dean, Gore met recently with the putative nominee, Senator Kerry: "John will be a great president for all Americans, and I want to do everything I can to help him fight against the outrageous and misleading campaign being waged by the Bush-Cheney campaign," Gore said. I predict that this statement will produce a significant round of chuckles and sneers among our hard-working, to the point of exhaustion, meritocratic media stars.

If you are especially curious about which of these three men hates/resents/ or other harbored secret negative attitudes, (fill in the blank) the other two, or vice versa Xs two, or how Gore really feels about Bill Clinton, also vice ersa, tune into Hardball during the next two days; depending on the headlines, Chris is sure to address this important issue, and if you're lucky, Peggy Noonan and Pat Caudell will be in attendence.

Watch also for amusing, in a putative sort of way, variations on "the six million dollar man." Remember all the references in campaigns past to Gore's mechanical inability to register as an actual human being. Expect also derisive references to the fact that by law, Gore couldn't keep the money for himself, though he could have donated it to charity, instead of to a political party, a choice whose ethical/moral implications, in view of the political party, eek, he chose, will no doubt be addressed by members of the Capital Gang. Look also for one of those crack political reporters at the NYTimes to interview some nameless Democrat to express relief that Gore no longer exits, politically speaking, and remark upon the pathos of Gore not understanding that.

Boos there will be, how many and aimed at what particular Gore failing is the only open question. Why? Because Al Gore is under the mistaken impression that he exits and that outrageous assumption on his part is a deadly giveaway that Al Gore still doesn't understand who it is in this country who gets to decide who does or does not exist.

For more pathetic evidence of Al Gore's delusions, click here, here, here, and here.

Beyond sad, isn't it?

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